Hello my lovelies,
I've been so backed up on my writings! I've been meditating but then I got busy. I am having my windows replaced on my house, my lanai glassed off and my pool house re-screened. Hooray! I always wanted a really nice house of my own since like forever. It doesn't have to be big but I always wanted it to be nice. In my meditations, I found that my thoughts were on fixing up this house. "This is falling apart" or "water leaks here" or "these colors don't match". I figured that this was obviously telling me something that I really wanted and I should do something about it.
I believe in making your home a beautiful sanctuary for you to come home to and peace out. It should be a place of bliss that calms you and a refuge after going out into the hustle and bustle of the world. When I was married, we were running a dog training business out of the house. I always had the goal or the wish that eventually the business would move out of the house but it never did. Dogs ruled my life. There was a constant flow of dogs moving in and out of the house for board and trains or doggie boot camp. Back in Chicago we would have up to 20 dogs at the house, the business was booming. We moved to Florida and downsized the business to stop boarding but only do boot camps since we started a family. Even with only boot camps, there was a constant rotation of dogs coming and going. It was impossible to fix things up, find quiet time, make things nice or simply keep the place clean. I was unhappy with my home environment. He loves working out of his house and I understand that but our houses were always small. It was too crowded for me.
When we moved to Florida we bought a house that needed a lot of work. The windows were drafty and leaked air, the lanai screens were blown out after 20+ years and hurricanes and I wanted the extra room indoors. The house is on a beautiful lot but everything was slowly needing replacement. Everything. I still live in that house. We never agreed on how to fix up the house and I felt like I was being held back from creating a beautiful house. Now that we are separated, I finally get to do the work on the place to create my beautiful, calm sanctuary. As I was living alone, more and more distractions were removed. I found creative energies flowing through me. I started writing, meditating and creatively creating the house and life of my dreams. I like a quiet, organized and clean house. It just makes me happy. I have much more to go but I am working on it one step at a time. It's exciting to watch it unfold, one step at a time. It's looking more and more beautiful everyday.